It’s been a while since my original not to-do list post so I thought it could do with a refresher. Like all lists my Not to-do list is constantly evolving. Once not doing something becomes a habit it can come off the list and also lists change as our work and lifestyle changes. For example, I now freelance for two days and teach nursery for three days. When I wrote my original not to-do lust I was teaching full time in a year 6 class. So as roles change so do the things you should and shouldn’t be doing. Now my not to-do lust has a greater emphasis on my time out of the classroom.
Also, your not to-do list should be in descending order. So the activity that has the greatest negative impact should be at the top. So even if you just stopped this one thing it should have a great impact on your productivity and ultimately your life.
Although, as this has the greatest impact it could also be the hardest I’ve to quit. So it may be worth to try out some of the lesser activities on your list first to get those quitting muscles working. But make sure you’re not just doing this to hide from doing the one that might be the most difficult.
The mistake I made was not revisiting my list often enough. I felt I had a pretty good handle on most of it then just let it slide. I now schedule a check in with my not to-do list every month. That should give me long enough to know if I’m truly on top of something and can take it off my list as I don’t do it any longer out of habit or if it needs more work.
Here’s my current list:
1. Drinking alcohol in the week.
2. Staying up late and comfort eating.
3. Comfort eating
4. Not using a Pomodoro for work-based activities.
5. Randomly picking up my phone and checking email, bbc or social media.
6. Watching TV for the sake of it.
7. Allowing myself to become distracted when I should be working.
8. Leaving objects lying on the carpet / flat surface.
9. Not having a clear focus for what I want to get done.
Simply writing the activities down may help bring them to light and this in itself will help to stop them. But I’ve found that many of the activities near the top of the list are often deeply ingrained habits that are difficult to drop so require a concerted effort and external support. So how best to make sure you can stop them for good?
Make it public
Share your goal with someone. Even better, do it online and make yourself accountable.
Associate pain to not changing
What will happen in your life if you don’t stop the activity that you’re focussing on? Really home I’m on the worst case scenario. Research shows that when it comes to the carrot and the stick, the stick wins every time so make it a big one to get yourself moving. In my case if I continue to drink excessively during the week, at the very least I will feel lethargic, will struggle to get up in the morning and get things done, like this blog. I’ll continue to gain weight and this will be compounded by the associated comfort eating late at night. My immune system and liver function will be affected and I will be at greater risk of cancer. Ultimately, I’m cutting my life short and robbing my family of a husband and father. Besides all this I’m setting a terrible example to my boys who will grow up thinking that it’s normal to drink on a daily basis.
Seeing this written down in the knowledge I’m going to make it public makes me feel nervous, but hopefully it will contribute to me achieving goal and stopping this damaging habit.
Make it StickK
StickK is an incredibly useful app that allows you to make a contract with yourself, identifying your goal and associating a financial cost if you don’t meet it. What makes it even more powerful is you can choose where this money goes. It can be to someone you know or even more powerfully, an anti- charity. I’m much more likely to stick to my new behaviour if I know that failure to do so will take money directly from my bank account to fund Donald Trump, the National Rifle Association, or on a more trivial level, Manchester United. You can also include a referee who will hold you accountable, verifying if you’ve stuck to your commitment. I’ve used it before for healthy eating and set the amount at £20 per week. It’s not a huge amount but enough to make me stop and think if that chocolate bar is worth £20? Invariably it’s not and giving myself the time to pause is often enough to realise I don’t need it.
So hopefully using these strategies can help me stop destructive activities giving me space and energy more important things in my life.
Barefoot Daddy 